Lesson 6
The Foundation of Our Faith-The Books of I & II Timothy, Titus, and Philemon
Living Relationships
July 6, 2003
Focus Thought
Life is comprised of many relationships. As we learn to live peaceably and
harmoniously with others in this life, we also are prepared to live with
others in eternity.
Scripture Reference
Leviticus 19:32
Proverbs 14:4
Luke 10:7
Galatians 6:1, 10
Expositional Passage
I Timothy 5:1-8, 17-20
1 Rebuke not an elder, but intreat him as a father; and the younger men as
brethren;
2 The elder women as mothers; the younger as sisters, with all purity.
3 Honour widows that are widows indeed.
4 But if any widow have children or nephews, let them learn first to shew
piety at home, and to requite their parents: for that is good and acceptable
before God.
5 Now she that is a widow indeed, and desolate, trusteth in God, and
continueth in supplications and prayers night and day.
6 But she that liveth in pleasure is dead while she liveth.
7 And these things give in charge, that they may be blameless.
8 But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own
house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.
. . . . .
17 Let the elders that rule well be counted worthy of double honour,
especially they who labour in the word and doctrine.
18 For the scripture saith, Thou shalt not muzzle the ox that treadeth out
the corn. And, The labourer is worthy of his reward.
19 Against an elder receive not an accusation, but before two or three
witnesses.
20 Them that sin rebuke before all, that others also may fear.
Focus Verse
I Timothy 5:25
Likewise also the good works of some are manifest beforehand; and they that
are otherwise cannot be hid.
LESSON OUTLINE
INTRODUCTION
I. LIVING WITH ONE ANOTHER
A. Brethren
B. Ladies
C. Widows
II. LIVING IN HARMONY WITH LEADERS
A. The Ruling Leader
B. The Accused Leader
C. The Guilty Leader
III. LIVING WITH OTHER PEOPLE
A. Be Fair
B. Be Wise
C. Be Pure
D. Be Patient
CONCLUSION
INTRODUCTION
Anyone who knows anything about relationships and dealing with people
understands that where there are people, there are problems. However, if we
can learn to deal properly and effectively with the problems that
relationships bring, the benefits of socialization will far outweigh the
challenges. The Book of Proverbs declares that "where no oxen are, the crib
is clean: but much increase is by the strength of the ox" (Proverbs 14:4).
Maintaining relationships with those around us may present special
challenges just as caring for an ox would bring special challenges and
responsibilities. However, only by enduring the difficulties that come from
dealing with people can we reap the joy that a fulfilling relationship
brings.
With practical and straightforward advice, the apostle Paul exhorted
Timothy to take extreme care in dealing with those around him. Paul
admonished him to pay particular attention to the age and gender of those
with whom he was dealing so that he could minister to them with all respect
and purity. Specific attention was given to the needs of godly widows who
had no children to support them. Paul also gave instructions in living with
and responding to the leaders of the church regardless of whether they were
standing in integrity, accused of wrongdoing, or guilty of sin. In Paul's
final charge in I Timothy 5, he advised Timothy to be fair, to be wise, to
be pure, and to be patient in all relationships.
"How far you go in life," believed George Washington Carver, "depends
on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged,
sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and strong. Because
someday in your life you will have been all of these" (Speaker's Sourcebook
II, Glen Van Ekeren). In developing successful relationships, we would do
well to heed Paul's admonition to the Galatians regarding relationships
(Galatians 6:1).
I. LIVING WITH ONE ANOTHER
As recognized by the apostle Paul in Galatians 6, every person is
susceptible to faults and failing and may find himself in need of mercy as
well as restoration. When one is overtaken in a fault, sin creeps upon him
suddenly and he is taken by surprise. Sin is no respecter of persons, and it
can influence the old as well as the young and the women as well as the men.
No one is exempt from making a mistake. Therefore, all of us need spiritual
leaders and fellow Christians who kindly and lovingly reprove, rebuke, and
restore.
Although Cain would have preferred to reject his responsibility in
life, he was still his brother's keeper. This principle is true also for
Christians. Because we are born into the body of Christ, secession is not a
viable option. We cannot survive apart from the body. Part of our role as
Christians is to look out for the rest of the body. Just as our whole body
hurts when our tooth aches, so should the whole body of Christ feel pain
when one of its members experiences difficulties.
Care and concern for the spiritual well-being of fellow brothers and
sisters should not be the exception; it should be the norm. We should be
concerned when a member of the body is overtaken by a fault. True
spirituality is not measured by one's willingness to expose sin but by one's
desire to see healing and restoration occur.
The issue is not whether correction is in order but the issue is how
correction is to be accomplished. Correction is in order as long as it is
done with the right motive and spirit. We should be concerned not only with
the words we speak but also with the spirit in which they are spoken.
A. Brethren
Occasionally, a younger man in leadership may find it necessary to
deal with a problem in the life of a man who is his senior. This individual
should not shy away from his responsibility to correct his elder, but he
should exercise caution and respect. Respecting those who are elders (which
in this verse refers to age and not to church government) was part of the
foundation of the law of Moses.
"Thou shalt rise up before the hoary head, and honour the face of the
old man, and fear thy God: I am the Lord" (Leviticus 19:32).
When the apostle Paul said to "Rebuke not an elder, but intreat him as
a father" (I Timothy 5:1), he was not suggesting that there should be no
correction; rather, he was addressing the manner in which correction is
made. The word "rebuke" translates from the Greek word epipleessoo, which
means, "to strike upon, beat upon; tropically, to chastise with words, to
chide, upbraid, rebuke" (Thayer's Greek Lexicon). The correction is to be
gentle, kind, and respectful.
"The word 'elder' here is not used in the sense in which it often is,
to denote an officer of the church, a presbyter, but in its proper and usual
sense, to denote an aged man. This is evident, because the apostle
immediately mentions in contradistinction from the elder, 'the younger men,'
where it cannot be supposed that he refers to them as officers.
Ours should be the spirit of Samuel, who, even when he had to convey a
message from God, modestly hesitated and waited for the appropriate
opportunity to deliver it. Even then he spoke with the reverence due Eli
because of his position and his age. If the situation warrants a younger man
correcting an older Christian, he should do so only with love, respect, and
gentleness.
Some leaders may think that their responsibility to be respectful and
kind ceases to exist when the person needing correction happens to be a
younger man. However, we are to treat younger men like brothers. It is not
God's will for those in leadership to use the power of their position to
humiliate those who are under them. Peter described the responsibility of
the leader as "neither as being lords over God's heritage, but being
ensamples to the flock" (I Peter 5:3). Men have a responsibility to treat
the younger men as brothers by coming to their aid.
B. Ladies
Leaders should exercise great care as they deal with the elder and
younger members of their same gender, but they should exercise even greater
care when dealing with the problems of those of the opposite gender. Leaders
should not correct elder women in a harsh and demeaning manner but lovingly
reprove and encourage them toward righteousness. He should entreat a lady as
if she were his mother (I Timothy 5:2).
Someone has said that "glass, china, and reputation are easily cracked
and never well mended" (Zingers, 260). Treating the younger women as sisters
ensures that they will be treated with love, gentleness, and affection that
flows from a righteous and pure motive.
C. Widows
One of the challenges faced by the early church was dealing with the
physical needs of those who were unable to care for themselves, specifically
widows. In Acts 6 the disciples appointed seven men to look after their
daily needs. Paul further clarified the responsibility of the church to
widows. He commanded Timothy to give honor to the widows who are widows
indeed. He also described the qualifications to receive support from the
church and he emphasized the responsibility of the family to care for their
own who are in need.
James said, "Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is
this, To visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, and to keep
himself unspotted from the world" (James 1:27). In the absence of other
assistance, the church has a tremendous responsibility to care for its own.
We often place great emphasis on the spiritual implications of following
Christ without understanding the social responsibilities that accompany
spirituality.
"As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men,
especially unto them who are of the household of faith" (Galatians 6:10).
Christians should help the less fortunate, especially those who are
part of the body of Christ. Paul indicated that we should give "honor" to a
"qualified widow" (I Timothy 5:3). The word "honor" translates from the
Greek word timao, which means, "to prize, i.e. fix a valuation upon; by
implication, to revere" (Strong's Concordance). From the idea of this word,
it is important both to revere or respect the widow and also to recognize
her value, which should include caring for her financial needs when she is
in need. However, it is not the responsibility of the church to assume the
burden of meeting everyone's physical needs without regard to qualification.
Not every widow was qualified for assistance but only those who were "widows
indeed."
To be considered a "widow indeed," a woman must be genuinely
desolate-without children or relatives to care for her. Moreover, Paul
indicated that a "widow indeed" could not be a woman who lived in
pleasure-not trusting God or giving herself to supplication and prayers, but
rather to wantonness, idleness, and spreading gossip. Anna, the prophetess
in Luke 2, was a great example of a widow indeed, for the Scripture says
that she departed not from the Temple but served God with fastings and
prayers night and day.
Paul further emphasized the importance of each family's recognizing
its responsibility to care for its own. The culture in which Paul lived was
adamant that children were to care for their aged parents. Moreover, there
were laws to ensure that children cared for their elderly parents, and those
who failed in their obligations faced stiff penalties. Paul admonished
Timothy that taking care of needy parents is more than just a social
obligation; it is the natural extension of a right relationship with God. In
I Timothy 5:4-8, Paul showed that taking care of needy family members
involves three things.
1. First, it is a physical manifestation of our love for God. A right
relationship with God will be characterized by a right relationship with
people. How can we love God, whom we have not seen, if we do not love our
brother whom we have seen (I John 4:20).
2. Second, it our duty based on that which they have done for us.
Children who have been fed, clothed, and nurtured by their parents have an
obligation to provide that same service to their parents who are unable to
care for themselves.
3. Finally, it pleases God. The final reason Paul gave for children to
provide for their parents was that it pleases God (I Timothy 5:4). Honoring
one's parents by caring for their needs is important to God, for the
principle appears in both the Old and the New Testaments. Jesus taught that
feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, and giving shelter to the homeless
are acts that are near to His heart. He said in Matthew 25:40, "Inasmuch as
ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it
unto me." Taking care of the needy, especially those who are of our
household and family, is not only our responsibility but also the will of
God.
II. LIVING IN HARMONY WITH LEADERS
Life brings with it relationships of many kinds that involve many
different people, and with each relationship comes a new set of roles,
rules, and expectations. After giving Timothy insight into living with those
around him, he turned to the subject of living in harmony with leaders.
A. The Ruling Leader
Three small boys were bragging about their dads. The first boy said,
"My dad writes a few short lines on paper, calls it a poem, sends it away,
and gets ten dollars for it."
"My dad," said the second, "makes dots on paper, calls it a song,
sends it away, and gets twenty-five dollars for it."
"That's nothing," declared the third boy. "My father writes a sermon
on a sheet of paper, gets up in the pulpit and reads it, and it takes four
men to bring in the money!" (Biblical Illustrator, Joseph Exell).
The subject of ministers and their pay has been a discussion that
reaches back to the very foundation of the church. Fortunately, we can look
to the writings of Paul to find principle and precedent by which to
determine compensation for spiritual leaders. In Galatians 6:6, Paul
admonished that those who receive spiritual admonition from a person have an
obligation to communicate, or transfer a material blessing to that person.
In his epistle to Timothy, Paul stated that an elder who rules well
should receive "double honor" (I Timothy 5:17). By the phrase "double honor"
Paul was referring to supplying monetary sustenance. Although special
recognition is due to one who excels as a leader, this verse implies that
all elders are worthy of compensation by virtue of the office if not by
their performance.
"Almost every critic of note allows that time [Double honour] here
signifies reward, stipend, wages. Let him have a double or a larger salary
who rules well; and why? Because in the discharge of his office he must be
at expense, in proportion to his diligence, in visiting and relieving the
sick, in lodging and providing for strangers; in a word, in his being given
to hospitality, which was required of every bishop or presbyter" (Adam
Clarke's Commentary).
Church leadership and ministry done correctly is not a light task; it
is demanding and challenging work. Leading believers well is not
accomplished by just a few hours on Sunday but requires a vigorous effort of
body, soul, and spirit throughout the week. Although the work may not always
be physically demanding, there are many preachers who would trade the mental
and spiritual demands for physical exertion on any given day. Those who give
themselves to the work of the ministry are worthy of just compensation. Paul
gave two examples to demonstrate this principle.
In the agrarian societies of old, oxen were valuable in the planting,
gathering, and processing of food. "When threshing was done in the east, the
sheaves of corn were laid on the threshing floor; then oxen in pairs were
driven repeatedly across them; or they were tethered to a post in the middle
and made to march round and round on the grain; or a threshing sledge was
harnessed to them and the sledge was drawn to and fro across the corn. In
all cases the oxen were left unmuzzled and were free to eat as much of the
grain as they wished as a reward for the work they were doing" (The Letters
to Timothy, Titus, and Philemon, William Barclay). This was not just a
custom, but it was mandated by the law of Moses in Deuteronomy 25:4. Those
who give their lives to the work of the ministry should not be muzzled or
restrained from receiving the fruits of their labors. If God is concerned
about the oxen and what they receive, the church should be concerned about
their leaders and their compensation.
Paul's second example evidently referred to the saying of Jesus
recorded in Luke 10:7: "The labourer is worthy of his hire." A man who works
all day expects to receive something for his efforts. An elder who works to
lead a congregation of believers should be able to expect remuneration for
his time spent for the kingdom. A man of God should not be made to feel
guilty for taking that for which he has worked, for a laborer is worthy of
his hire.
B. The Accused Leader
"Death and life are in the power of the tongue" (Proverbs 18:21). This
proverb reveals the most disruptive and destructive element in
relationships. James said, "The tongue can no man tame; it is an unruly
evil, full of deadly poison" (James 3:8). Many lives and relationships have
been ruined because of a careless word spoken. Paul advised Timothy on the
manner in which he should or should not receive an accusation against an
elder. Because of the importance of the office and the influence that a
leader has, special rules apply when one is accused of wrongdoing.
The law of Moses required a minimum of two or three witnesses for a
judicial conviction. Paul instructed that a person should not entertain such
an accusation without the evidence of more than one person.
The church has a responsibility to give the benefit of the doubt to
the elder when there is only one accuser. This ordinance protects the pastor
from a vindictive church member who is disgruntled. Paul also intended by
this to shelter the reputation of church leaders until such a time as there
is sufficient evidence to receive an accusation. The failing of a leader is
no light matter, for it affects not just that person but all who are
associated with him. After an accusation is justly and appropriately
received, the proper officials can examine the evidence and judge it.
C. The Guilty Leader
What if a leader is found guilty of an accusation? Because the actions
of a church leader affect those who follow him, a leader who is convicted of
wrongdoing may be reproved publicly by the appropriate official. The purpose
of a public rebuke is not to destroy the offending elder but to demonstrate
the seriousness of sin, to maintain the dignity of the office, and to serve
as an example to others.
Spiritual leaders are accountable for their sin to those charged with
their spiritual oversight.
III. LIVING WITH OTHER PEOPLE
Paul gave Timothy some parting words concerning the administration of
the instructions that he had given to him. Although the advice referred
specifically to matters concerning church leaders, it is applicable to other
relationships in the body of Christ. In living in harmony with leaders and
with other people, we must be fair, wise, pure, and patient. Mastering these
qualities will make our relationships more successful and will promote unity
and harmony in the church.
A. Be Fair
Paul urged Timothy to administer his office without prejudice or
preferential treatment. The tendency of human behavior is to gravitate to
those with whom one has something in common. A good leader is one who does
not let his personal preferences influence the decisions required by his
office. As we attempt to fulfill Paul's admonition, we must strive to be
fair in everything we do. Being fair requires consistency in matters of
discipline and leadership.
Fairness should extend to every facet of leadership. We should be
careful to form church policies, programs, and departments in a fair and
impartial way. Societies of past and present have consistently had an
element of prejudice, preference, and partiality. These actions and
attitudes have no place in the church. (See Galatians 3:28.)
B. Be Wise
In living in harmony with others, it is impossible to overstate the
value or necessity of wisdom. Successful church leadership requires that
wisdom be the guiding principle for every decision.
We live in a fast-paced society that continues to accelerate rapidly.
Business transactions that once took weeks can now be accomplished in a
matter of minutes. People share information across the world through
computers connected to the Internet. Fast food restaurants and convenience
stores proliferate. However, in spite of the world's fast pace the church
must be careful not to make hasty decisions concerning the selection and
appointment of leaders.
Paul said that we have an obligation to know them who labor among us
(I Thessalonians 5:12). If ever there was a day that the church needed
workers, it is today. Still, we must be careful that in our desire and need
for workers we do not cast wisdom aside and appoint individuals to positions
in the church for which they are not qualified. Paul told Timothy to "lay
hands suddenly on no man" (I Timothy 5:22). In other words, we are not to
hastily ordain ministers and leaders in the church, but allow for a time of
proving and qualification. It is customary that before a person receives a
job he must demonstrate that he is qualified to assume the responsibilities
of that position. Placing a person in a role that he is unqualified to fill
is a setup for failure, which can bring dishonor to the church. We should be
wise in every appointment to leadership in the church.
C. Be Pure
One of the greatest dangers in living among flawed people with their
problems is falling prey to sin oneself. It is too easy for leaders to
overlook their own shortcomings as they attempt to care for the needs of
others. Paul wrote to the Christians at Corinth, "But I keep under my body,
and bring it into subjection: lest that by any means, when I have preached
to others, I myself should be a castaway" (I Corinthians 9:27).
Every Christian bears a personal responsibility to remain pure in the
sight of God, and it is a responsibility that one cannot delegate to others.
Paul told Timothy, "Keep thyself pure" (I Timothy 5:22).
"One day a young minister was being escorted through a coal mine. At
the entrance of one of the dim passageways, he spied a beautiful white
flower growing out of the black earth. 'How can it blossom in such purity
and radiance in this dirty mine?' the preacher asked.
"'Throw some coal dust on it and see for yourself,' his guide replied.
When he did, he was surprised that the fine, sooty particles slid right off
the snowy petals, leaving the plant just as lovely and unstained as before"
(The Biblical Illustrator, Joseph Exell). The plant's surface was so smooth
that the grit and grime could not adhere to it. Our hearts should have the
same characteristic. Leadership may require us to deal with sin, but we do
not have to let it attach itself to us. We commit ourselves to remaining
pure in spite of the circumstances that come our way.
Paul went on to admonish Timothy that in seeking to remain pure he
should use a little wine for his stomach's sake (I Timothy 5:23). Some have
thought this to be a strange insertion of seemingly irrelevant advice, but
it was very intentional by Paul. Paul was simply saying that there is no
virtue in asceticism that does the body more harm than good. Timothy had
probably taken a vow to reject any product of the vine and was therefore
constrained always to drink water. Contaminated water was probably a
continual source of irritation for Timothy's weakened stomach. However, in
the name of purity and dedication he would not avail himself of a remedy.
Paul advocated the use of the fruit of the vine to help with his
infirmities. "It was not for the pleasure to be derived from the use of
wine, or because it would produce hilarity or excitement, but solely because
it was regarded as necessary for the promotion of health; that is, as a
medicine" (Barnes' Notes).
D. Be Patient
The final quality that Paul discussed in I Timothy 5 is patience. He
discussed with Timothy the impossibility of ultimate concealment. There are
obvious sinners whose sins clearly are leading to their disaster and
punishment; and there are secret sinners who, behind a front of
unimpeachable righteousness, live a life that is in essence evil and ugly
(Barclay, 120). However, there also are the righteous whose works have been
plain to see and those around them have celebrated their piety; and then
there are those who have given themselves to good works who have never been
noticed, never thanked, never appreciated, and never given the honor that
they deserve. How can we know what kind of Christian some people really are?
Be patient! There is nothing that escapes the attention of God, and every
person's works eventually will be revealed.
James wrote to a group of people who were frustrated with the
injustice that they were experiencing. The rich were taking advantage of the
poor, who desired to take revenge. James told them to be patient: "Be
patient therefore, brethren, unto the coming of the Lord. Behold, the
husbandman waiteth for the precious fruit of the earth, and hath long
patience for it, until he receive the early and latter rain" (James 5:7).
Abraham Lincoln once said, "You can fool some of the people all the
time and all the people some of the time, but you can't fool all the people
all the time." Regardless of people who may be fooled, God cannot be fooled.
As we live among our fellow Christians, "We must neither grow angry at the
apparent escape of others nor embittered at the apparent thanklessness of
men, but we must be content to leave all things to the ultimate judgment of
God" (The Letters to Timothy, Titus, and Philemon, William Barclay).
CONCLUSION
Establishing and maintaining healthy relationships requires a
concentrated effort. Good things do not just happen; they are a result of
the proper seed being sown. Thankfully, God has given us detailed
instructions through His Word on how to deal with every type of
relationship. Regardless of age, gender, situation, personality, or position
of any individual, the Bible gives a prescription for a successful
relationship that is pleasing to God. God never intended for mankind to be
in isolation, and therefore it is imperative that we know how to get along,
especially if we plan to live together in eternity.
Through Paul's instructions to Timothy we understand the importance of
treating our elders with respect, the younger men with dignity, and of
maintaining purity when dealing with those of the opposite sex. We also
learn of the need to care for the needs of our own, of caring for those who
have no one else to care for them, and of compensating leaders appropriately
for their labor. Moreover, Paul urged Timothy to give double honor or
compensation to the leaders who excel.
In this chapter we also learned of requiring multiple witnesses
whenever an elder is accused of impropriety, of the seriousness of leaders
falling into sin, and the need for fairness, wisdom, purity, and patience.
Giving oneself to these principles both produces healthy relationships and
brings glory to God.
REFLECTIONS
. Is it proper for a younger man to correct a man older than himself?
Discuss.
. What three reasons are given by Paul to honor the "widows indeed"?
Discuss.
. Who holds the primary responsibility of taking care of the needy? Discuss.
. Discuss the biblical principle of compensating a pastor or church leader
for his labors for the kingdom.
. Discuss how to deal appropriately with an accusation against a leader.
Open your ears to God before you open your mouth to others.
Isaiah 50:4
The Lord GOD hath given me the tongue
of the learned, that I should know how to
speak a word in season to him that is weary:
he wakeneth morning by
morning, he wakeneth mine ear to hear as the learned.
YBIC, THOMAS AND YSIC, LINDA.
pofm@...