A Dating Preparedness Checklist
by Kathy Ross

Before you begin a dating relationship, consider your answers to the following questions. Apply the questions to yourself, and then to your prospective dating partner.

  1. How would you describe your relationship with your parents? Is it mutually respectful, open, honest, tense, guarded, peaceful, painful, warm, cold, close, distant, healthy, unhealthy? What words would you choose?
  2. How would you describe your relationships with your brothers and sisters, other family members, teachers, church leaders, boss(es), co-workers, Christian friends, non-Christian friends?
  3. Do you experience more contentment than restlessness, or more restlessness than contentment? Are you enjoying life now, or hoping you will find enjoyment later?
  4. What do you find yourself daydreaming about most often? Can you see any pattern to your daydreams that would help you to understand what areas and issues of life you need to be working on?
  5. In describing yourself, what words would you choose? Do you find more to like than to dislike? Can you identify some strengths? some weaknesses? What benefits do you bring into your relationships? What do you contribute?
  6. Are your sexual desires under control or are they controlling you? Have you developed some successful strategies for dealing with those desires? Do you know what kinds of things trigger problems? Are you struggling with guilt?
  7. Do you find yourself pressuring people to spend time with you, to show you care and concern? Do you find yourself easily subject to pressure, saying yes when you really wish to say no?
  8. How do you handle your finances/time? Do you spend as much as you earn/have? Have you ever developed a budget? and stuck to it? Do you have savings/free time? Do you give a portion of your earnings/time to your church?
  9. What kinds of ministries have you involved yourself in? Do you know by experience what kinds of ministries produce the most fruit in you and through you? which ones you find most fulfilling, stimulating, and challenging? How much of your time each week do you spend in ministry to those inside the church? to those outside the church? How regular and consistent are you?
  10. Have you developed a set of goals for your life? How realistic are they? Can you distinguish between goals and desires? What steps have you taken/are you taking toward fulfillment of your goals?

Dr. Hugh Ross
Director of Reasons to Believe
P.O. Box 5978
Pasadena, CA 91107
(818) 335-1480
(818) 852-0178 (fax)
Copyrighted © 1988
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